Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Brand New Day

I can't stop listening to this song lately, it's just really speaking to me and where I am right now. Feeling on the verge of something huge and new, and the opportunities that keep showing up over and over to take those trepidatious first steps(yes, I may have made up a new word ;) ) that head towards this unknown that keeps calling to me.

I love this video, because it is so unexpected. And as I attempted to watch it this morning, in fits and starts because of needing to break up some fighting, or tend to someone overwhelmed with emotion, I got it. That it's ALWAYS a brand new day, in each second. Everything is new, and the past is past and CAN be just dropped. I'd like to say I moved with that knowing throughout my day, and honestly I did remind myself of it often. Did it make my feelings dissolve? Or the fighting stop? Or keep me from saying unkind things towards the one whose actions resulted in a sibling with a bloody nose? Nope. But still it was comforting that, yes, this moment is a new one, and I can choose differently. Or not. Maybe I need to continue through with where this is going. Maybe I have to allow the pressure to build up inside me until I decide it's not worth it to hold the pressure in anymore, to open the relief valve and let it fizzle. To finally fully LOOK at what is causing the pressure in the first place.

Also, through watching the video, the lines "for the first time in such a long long time, I know I'll be okay" really made sense, with respect to "big" things. It seems like the more "big" and "pushed me to the edge" things I've been through, the more I can look back and KNOW I was taken care of, and yes, I will be okay. No matter what, I will be okay. :)

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